Sunday, August 9, 2009

The Judge, Jury and Executioner

The world of reality TV, what to say? There are the contestants, the interviewers, the host and last but never least, the judges. There is always the good, the bad, the fence sitter and the guest. Whilst sifting through the latest Channel 10 had to offer, I must admit, I feel victim to So If You Think You Can Dance. I absolutely adore the show for basically the talent, and also what the judges have to spew up each week. Especially, the person you both love to hate, and hate to be entertained by.
Mary Murphy.

Oh pray to the fake tan gods! A 40 yr old woman in a low cut top, baked better than the best Christmas Pork, glazed by the honey gods, dripping in over the top jewels, teeth as white as your newborns rear end and the ultimate American sensationalist with far too much volume and seemingly not enough brains.

Evidence:










I think pictures speak louder than words here.

THEN we move onto someone I am in no way fond of, mostly because every compliment she hands out, it follows with 'Your Welcome' like it was some sort of fucking gift from the judge panel gods in the sky. Yes, Marcia Hines I am referring to you. You with your heavily muscled arms, broad shoulders, slight lisp and black attitude. You who hands out sweet nothings to unsuspecting, vulnerable young people as though they should accept it with the graciousness that God bestowed on them. And in terms of what she actually contributes to the show, she is like the white lie that drips of everyones lips, sucked up by a giant wave and smashed on all of us viewers, her words are 'nothings' but empty promises and false praise, often leaving you more confused than you started out. Don't worry young potential Idol that you can't sing for shit, in a singing competition, Marcia would praise you for you 'spirit' or 'soul'. It sickens me.

Evidence:




Then, my last bone to pick tonight with reality televisions host/judges. Is that everytime I watch a So If You Think You Can Dance Australia episode, Natalie Basingthaffasdjkfniasdu (??) and the female british judge always, always, always look like they just down a bottle of vodka and a 'dollop' of all things perscription.
Evidence:

Now...I thought about finding evidence (actually did try) but I could not find the action shot that perfectly summed up either of their on air brilliance, maybe you will have to check out the show yourself. But kudos to Nat Bass who has maintained her 'smokin' status throughout.

Enough of this, nobody cares, nobody likes reality TV but my god, there is some pure trash on there that is almost at the core of all things bad taste, and I love it. So check it out if your keen.


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