I have a very awful habit, and I guess its actually a personality trait, to overthink, over-analyse and just basically over power my feeble brain by trying to think too much. Often, over analysing, just the word itself implies to do too much of something, but what are the effects? For me, I am often left more confused than I begun with and certainly have many paranoid attacks over the results.
A few I have noticed that over the years I have succumbed to, is to over analyse even the most basic aspects of life.
Example 1. Breathing
When I was a small child, sleeping used to be something that came easy. Until one night I was up, tossing and turning like I never had before and thats when I realised, I was sure it, I had forgotten how to sleep. So I lay there still in the ever darkening dark thinking on how I had I always managed to fall asleep and what was different now. Then I had the 'Eureka' moment. My 5 year old self was sure that to sleep, you needed to stop breathing. So I spent the next few hours trying to hold my breath till I assume I eventually passed out from lack of oxygen and drifted into a haze. Of course until the next few nights when over thinking plagued me with the question on how exactly do I fall asleep.
Also, sleeping next to someone. Now I suppose blogging is a way to admit these dark issues that haunt us in our minds, and what better way than to share it over a medium that almost anyone can access. So here's to mental instability! Back to sleeping next to someone. On quiet nights, when you are not the first to fall asleep and all you can hear is the breeze on the trees outside and the rise and fall of your friends chest, you start to think about how they breathe. Sleeping breath is one of the nicest, most purest moments I could ever think of. Not to sound like a stalker, but I think sleeping is the closest people come to ever crawling back into that womb that we so dearly cherished for 9months. A place of innocence at least to onlookers. But I lie there trying to align my breathes with theirs, until I fear I am breathing to loudly for all to hear, or not breathing enough that I am slowly suffocating myself. It can be a very awkward task to try and snap yourself out of.
Example 2. Walking
Walking is something that comes to us, we all learn it, we all conquer it, we all have a different way of doing it, maybe the expression should be 'It's like walking, once you learn you never forget', get rid of all this bike nonsense. Well I guess the reason we don't use that expression is because we DO forget.
I was walking down a hill today, a hill I have walked down for the past 2 years, the same path, the same damn road, the same grass, yet this time the only thing that had changed was my brain and its communication with my legs. I was angle walking, viciously. I looked like a drunk woman doing an 8am walk of shame back from a very very big night (shoes in hand of course), but alas, I was not. It was 8am of course, but I was sober, showered, wided eyed and bushy tailed but maybe my brain didn't wake up yet because my feet started to wiggle alittle. Like I suddenly was doing the hokey pokey down the hill...right foot in, right foot out... To add to my mind blank, I also cross paths with numerous construction workers, who all witnessed my gap brained moment of walking shame. I was definitely thinking about walking as my brain tripped into the ecstacy of ignorance, maybe that was what did it?
Example 3. Spelling
Bolognese, Spaghetti, neccessary, naughty, forty, plague, vague, accommodation.
Ever stare at a word for so long you are convinced you have spelt it wrong?
Bolognaise, spahgetti, nescessary, nourghty, fourty, vaige, acomodation.
Examples of common ones that often annoy me to the point I need to walk away from the paper, gather the skills that I was taught for 12 years and reapply them to real life. Yes - English was a skill I would use every day. No - I will not always be good at it.
Example 4. Long Division
Just as a fun fact - I ALWAYS forget how to do this, then at the right moment of insanity, PING! I remember.
Nothing any of you needed to know, nothing I cared to share. But now because of my sharing all of you know something that I never cared to need.
